How It All Began

When I was 14 years old I discovered what I considered then to be my salvation. I “found” Christ. Asked him to forgive me for my sins and was baptized in his name. I attempted to be paitent and quietly asked for answers to my questions concerning my life. What was I supposed to do, how was I supposed to accomplish it? I prayed, in the conventional way, and received no response. I began praying in my own way… my own way, was a prayer that never ended. I continously spoke to God, all day. I felt that it was a stronger prayer than one that ended. My prayer was continous, and as I felt, Strong. My faith was unwavering.

Then, one day, I didn’t feel it anymore. It wasn’t a slow stopping of belief, but a quick removal of faith. The disappearance of my faith occurred overnight.

I tried not to let it leave me, I prayed harder, stronger. I asked for guidance from the youth leaders in my church. Instead I was met with strong resistance. The church didn’t like me asking questions. They didn’t like the Questions I asked. I stopped attending. I stopped congregating and allowed my faith to leave me.

This leaving of my faith happened right before I turned 16. For almost two straight years prior I was devout.

In December of 2003 my Grandfather and Uncle gave me the book, “The Purpose Driven Life”, by Rick Warren. At that time I was struggling with the disappearance of my faith.

The Purpose Driven Life, as described on their website, is a, “A groundbreaking manifesto on the meaning of life.” Apparently this book is supposed to help you find your puporse. When it was given to me, I was for sure that it was a sign from God. This book was going to save me. Save my faith, save my devotion. The book is set up with a lesson a day. There are 40 lessons. Think 40 days, 40 nights on a walkabout to find God.

The first time I tried to follow the 40 day lessons , I got to day 10. For some reason I felt betrayed. My impression of this book at the time was demeaning and I felt that is lessened the worth of my being. This may have been for a numerous list of reasons. I can’t remember now what made me angry, but instead of deepening my relationship with Christ, I felt that perhaps Christianity was not the path for me.

I restructured my life. No longer basing my life off living in a path of God. I felt the best way to live, was to try and be good. Do things with good intentions and live a life that I felt put the well being of life above all.

Years later, while attempting to practice medition, a friend pointed me in the direction of another piece of literature that was lesson based. The Way of the Wizard: Twenty Spiritual Lesson for Creating the Life You Want by Deepak Chopra. While it is only based off of 20 lessons, versus the 40 from The Purpose Driven Life, it also has lessons to take you through your life in the search of the readers “inner Wizard.”

It’s basic concept is is take you on a spiritual journey to find your inner wizard.

My goal is to read these lessons, not on a daily basis, but on a weekly basis. During this journey, I plan to take you through what I read and to show the comparisons between the two seemingly different groups of thought.

Once we have finished these lessons, I won’t stop there. I hope to continue this same idea of exploration with other pieces of literature that have been passed my way, all of them with the hope of finding a purpose or reason or guide to all of our spiritual journeys.

My ultimate purpose is to navigate this wisdom with you, the readers, and along the way to enable all of us to find comfort and happiness with our lives, both spiritual and ethereal, although some may say those are one in the same.